3 Reasons Why Guys Have a Hard Time Talking About Money

Money doesn’t have to be a stressful issue in your life.

—

My grandfather would often say, “Let’s talk about money first since it’s an uncomfortable topic.” Money is one of those topics that we would rather not think about but know is essential to our lives. As guys, we especially would rather avoid talking about money.

I have made close to a million dollars in my lifetime. I wish I could tell you I still have it, but most of the money is long gone. I spent a lot of it on foolish and childish material possessions, but I was smart enough to use some of it to pay off all our debt.

I have been terrible with money most of my life but have learned some invaluable life lessons from my mistakes. In 2014, I knew that I couldn’t continue with my stance of avoidance. I had to get proactive and intentional.

♦◊♦

Money is not everything in life, but you do need it. You don’t have to be a millionaire, but most men would love to live comfortably and free of financial stress. Talking about money is hard, even with our partner, but we know it’s important. We have to find a way to verbalize what we’re thinking and experiencing in our minds—good or bad. Here are three reasons why guys may have a hard time talking about money.

1. What You Were Taught Growing Up

The studies tell us that money isn’t a topic that’s freely discussed growing up. If you think about it, it’s part of the cycle. Parents may struggle with their finances, or are indifferent and, therefore, don’t teach their children. The child then grows up and does the same thing with his children. Unless you are exposed to an external motivator, the cycle will continue.

We don’t learn about finances in school because we’re too busy memorizing a wealth of information we won’t use in everyday life. Throughout our childhood, the information we need to start our adult life isn’t getting taught.

Lesson: Teach your kids about money and study it on your own. Even though we weren’t taught finances, we live in an interconnected time. You can Google money and come up with over 100 million search results. There are libraries of books, thousands of courses, and a ton of videos that can educate you about how to properly manage your finances. We don’t have to feel powerless because we grew up not knowing.

2. You’re Living Paycheck-to-Paycheck

Because most guys weren’t taught how to properly manage finances, most of us end up in debt and living paycheck-to-paycheck for most of our lives. It may be student loans, it may be credit cards, or it may be spending money on toys, but we get into the hole and hurt our chances of experiencing freedom.

Living paycheck-to-paycheck usually means you’re stressed out. Most of us would rather not think or talk about issues that stress us out. As hard as it is, talking through what you’re feeling could be the key to starting the climb out of the hole. Your partner, a close friend, or a wise counselor could see what you may not be able to see. They may also have some knowledge that could be helpful to your situation.

3. You Struggle With Self-Limiting Beliefs

Maybe you were taught about money, but it was all negative. You may have been taught that money causes problems and ruins a life. You grew up thinking money was wrong and wanted to avoid thinking and talking about money. Maybe you believe you can’t make money.

Our system/government is set up reward those who have money. You may think that there’s no way for the average man to create wealth. That’s a big fat lie.

I have applied some common sense saving and investing principles and seen results I long believed were impossible. We are living financially free and seeing our money work for us in the markets. Chances are there are many guys reading this who have had the same experience. Creating wealth–for the average person–is like gambling in Vegas. You can’t beat the house, but you can win.

Money is not evil if you understand it and don’t make it your life goal. If your goal is freedom from financial stress, that’s an admirable and attainable goal. Don’t let the fear of money become a crippling self-limiting belief in your life.

♦◊♦

I don’t know what you were taught about money, and I don’t know where you are in life. I do know that you will need money. I do know that living financially free takes so much stress away from an already stressful life.

We live in a time ripe with opportunity to create freedom. It could be getting a better job, starting a side hustle, or starting a business. The Internet alone offers a potential customer base of billions of people.

Read an excellent book. Educate yourself about how things work and what’s possible. More than anything, communicate. Don’t shut those closest to you out of what’s going on. You’ll feel better after you verbalize what you’re struggling with, and it will help you clarify what you need to do next.

This all starts in your mind. If you can’t see it happening or believe it’s possible for you, you’ll never take the necessary steps to create freedom in your life. It starts in your mind, and it should start today.

Do you talk about money?

—

Photo: Flickr/ David Goehring

The post 3 Reasons Why Guys Have a Hard Time Talking About Money appeared first on The Good Men Project.